Porn Addiction - The Guilty Secret

By Paddy Landau

Bob is depressed. He suffers from low self-esteem and easily feels guilty. He is taking anti-depression medication, and his doctor is unsure what is worrying Bob.

Bob's family is also worried. They don't see much of him, and he shows little interest in woman after he and his last girlfriend split over a year ago. His friends have all but given up on him.
Bob's workmates persuaded Bob to come along with them that evening after work. They've noticed that Bob is withdrawn and doesn't interact much, and it doesn't surprise them that he leaves early. They wonder how much longer he will be with the company, because these days he tends to get in late and work poorly.

It's lucky that Bob doesn't have a wife or children, because it's interesting to find out what Bob does at home...

Bob gets home, walks in, locks the door, turns the computer on, makes a cup of coffee and sits down. A few minutes later, he is downloading porn and "enjoying" the pictures and videos. Late into the night he continues, more and more porn, until, exhausted, he reluctantly turns off the computer and flops into bed.

Bob's real problem is not depression or low self-esteem. Those are side effects of something more nasty - a type of obsession known as porn addiction. It is as consuming as any addictive drug, and can have devastating effects on the sufferer. Often, the man (it's hardly ever a woman) doesn't even realise that he has a problem until it's too late: He's fired for downloading pornographic pictures at work, or his wife, confused and hurt, leaves him.

Pornographic addiction usually happens when a man has some sort of social problem and, as a consequence, fails to have fulfilling relationships, whether family, friends or sexual. His emotions are out of sync with reality and he lives in his own personal fantasy.

As with any other addictive drug, porn addiction grows in its demands. The need to find ever more explicit, exciting or perfect material drives the addict, who spends more and more time seeking it. He may spend money on videos and magazines, or spend many hours searching on the Internet. The empty thrills that he gets hides his real problems, becoming not just a crutch but an all-consuming habit that he has no idea how to get rid of. Going "cold turkey" is something he cannot even imagine doing.

Fortunately for Bob, there are solutions. The good thing is that, unlike with addictive drugs, there is no physical damage to his body. However, because he has been surviving on adrenalin and other sex-related hormones, he will have withdrawal symptoms.

Bob needs to get the help of anyone and everyone that will give him non-judgemental support. He may speak to his doctor, who would refer a therapist. He would do well to seek out the services of a hypnotherapist, who would greatly speed his recovery. Bob - especially if he is afraid to seek help - could turn to the Internet, this time not for the problem but for a solution to the problem, by downloading a suitable self-help hypnotherapy track for porn addiction.
More on porn addiction, and where to find self-help for pornography addiction.